I often wonder if a person could really have sex without emotions involved. Well, I made a little study about this and I found out that this is really possible. I interviewed some of my friends and gave me insights on how this works.
FUBU…. The first time I heard this word I was totally clueless. A friend once said to me “Mommy Rose, go ahead and enjoy your life and just find a FUBU.” Don’t go into a serious relationship, just have fun. And my quick reply back then. What the hell is a FUBU?!? My friend answered me, a FUCK BUDDY. A WHAT?!? A person you call when you need to scratch the itch. Is there such a thing? Yes, she said. Hmmmm….. That intrigued me. I never knew that a person can have sex without feelings or emotions involved. I thought it was supposed to be an intimate activity which we share with someone we love. It is different nowadays. I know at least 4 friends who are just happy to have a FUBU rather a committed relationship with someone. I asked a gay friend how do you do this? How do you separate your feelings from your inner desires or lust? He said to me that Yes, he initially is attracted to the person. It is more of a physical need rather than an emotional need. Once it’s done, it’s done for him. He does not have any communication with that person. Just to fulfill his desires. Another friend of mine said it was okay for her to be the FUBU of a guy who was going steady with another girl. She said it was fine, we just enjoy ourselves in bed and that’s it. One of my best friend to my surprise agreed to this set up as well. The guy would text her if he would need company and vice versa.
They chose this kind of set up because it has less complications, hassle free, commitment free. It’s like if I need you, I’ll call you. If I don’t, I wont.
I said to them but what if you start falling for that person? It is possible right? YES, they all said but don’t allow yourself to get into such a mess. Otherwise this all changes the set up. So why engage in such? Well, to scratch the itch, to feel good about yourself, to enjoy.
After hearing this, I said to myself. Can I do this too? I mean to engage in sex with someone you don’t have any connection with, just a sexual connection? My answer was no. A big no. Call me a hypocrite but I would not want to engage in such. It is very hard not to get attached or hooked to someone whom you have shared something special. You allow someone to get intimate with you if you share the same emotions and feelings for each other. Sex is not a game nor a past time. It’s not suppose to be casual.
Please don’t get me wrong. I do not have anything against people with Fuck buddies. My principle in life is if it makes you happy, then go ahead. Enjoy… Just know the repercussions of your actions. A person should be responsible for the outcome of having casual sex. Take pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases or worst HIV/AIDS. I mean if you are going to do it then be prepared and be very extra careful with people you get in contact with.
SEX should be special. Special in the sense that you share it with a special person at the right time with all the strings attached.