For my daughter Camille….
As a mother, it’s the worst nightmare for any of our children to get hurt most especially on matters of the heart. It’s like you have protected these children from other people and circumstances all their lives and here comes a nobody hurting the feelings of our beloved children.
First broken heart… I dreaded the day that I will come face to face with one of my kids getting brokenhearted. Quite honestly, I don’t know what to do. The first time this ever happened it pierced my heart to the core. I noticed that it was early in the morning that my eldest daughter woke me up and said she was going to school. She was in her freshman year in college and I noticed the time that it was too early for school and she really looked sad. I knew she wanted to tell me something. I asked her what’s wrong? and she just said nothing mom, I’m fine. But when you are a mother you know deep inside that there is something wrong. I asked her again and she answered. The guy that I was seeing started to date someone else. A nursing student. He said he loved me, but why is he seeing someone else? and tears welled up in her eyes. I could not explain the pain I felt. It was as if I was stabbed in my heart. I hugged my daughter so tight and told her it was ok to cry. I told her just let it all out. Mama is here for you, and I will never ever leave you because I love you. Quite honestly, as a mother I felt like killing the guy or punch him on the face but it’s not suppose to be like that. I have to show my daughter to be strong and to accept the hurt. Then I told her, well there are a lot of jerks out there that you should be careful. Not all people will treat you fairly, sincerely and love you completely. Be wise my dear daughter in choosing the right guy. Do not believe every single rosy word they will tell you. I should know, Been there, Done that.
I had a fair share of bad break ups, bad relationships and wrong men. I guess I have learned as I go through life. I am a better person now and I more careful.
All of us in one way or another will have to deal with a broken heart. It’s not perfect the first time. We may not find the right one in one go. It may take years, it may take forever but the important thing is that we must always be ready to get hurt, to take a chance, to be willing to forgive, to make mistakes and to learn and move on gracefully. At times we feel like it’s the end of the world but surely everyone surpasses the pain and agony of a broken heart.
I teach my kids to be brave all the time. To face problems head on. It is not a weakness to cry especially when they get hurt because of love. The most important lesson I have taught them about Love is Love is not perfect all the time, there will be rough and crazy days, you may get hurt badly but you have to learn to stand up again, know who you are and that you are worthy of being loved, Forgive so you gain peace of mind, learn from your mistakes and most of all Love and respect yourself more so you can love and respect others much much more.
So it’s fine if your kids say Mom/Dad I broke my heart, just let them know that WE are there to help them heal and mend it…..